Sunday, August 18, 2013

Frontieres (2007)

Why everyone rides the "new wave of French horror" dick so hard is beyond me. Between the praise for movies like High Tension, Martyrs and Inside, you'd think the Frenchies were doing something innovative or creative. And these movies have been a whole lot of neither of those things. Except for their over-the-top violence and penchant for having excessively blood-soaked women come out as the heroines/sole survivors, these movies don't offer anything remarkable.

Frontieres is yet another French movie that follows the same formula and leaves the same unmemorable, indifferent feeling. Some twenty-somethings are involved in some looting and rioting during a time of political turmoil in France and run from the cops after one of their friends gets caught, beaten and near death in a hospital. They make it to some run-down hostel/farm on the edge of town run by a family with some rednecky looking folks (a la Texas Chainsaw) and a slutty blonde chick.

There's a Nazi patriarch who spouts really cliche German lines in between his really shitty French, a youngish looking, shy/autistic/retarded girl, and some mutant inbred children who live in a mineshift. The movie goes on for way too long, the main girl manages to avoid being shot by multiple people even though she spazzes around like she's having a 30 minute seizure (and yet manages to take out the jacked, beefy member of the family).There's lots of really dark brown blood (why does every movie insist on having buckets of overly dark colored blood) and some shit covered pigs.

Do yourself a favor and watch TCM instead.

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