Exodus - Blood in Blood Out (2014)

When I first heard that the fat, afro-wave Bon Scott wannabe was back in the band (again) I was pretty excited. For one, I've always preferred 'Pleasures...' over 'Bonded...' and two, I thought that he sounded pretty damn good fronting his kid's band, however weird that concept may be.

Well, impact was assuredly imminent and the reunion of Souza and Exodus turned out to be one big crash and fucking burn.

The riffs are a grab-bag of 'ok' mixed in with sonic Xanax and other, various sleep inducing benzos. The main problem with them (and pretty much the album as a whole) is the production. This is quite possibly the worst sounding Exodus album in that regard. Having a "full" sound is normally good, yet, as with everything else in life, there is always the potential to overdo shit and boy did this thing overstay its welcome the oven!

While I thought Souza sounded killer in Hatriot, he sounds downright awful here. Of course the atrociously juvenile lyrics do not help in any way. They may have been cool 30 years ago, written by some hessian teen with a 1/4 ounce of pot tucked away in the pocket of his flannel, but to hear this shit dribbling fourth from a 50 year old goes WAY beyond the realm of comedy and is just plain excruciating to endure.

TRUST me... this is nowhere near as good as the first few Exodus albums. Hell, it aint even as good as Force of Habit! It's just one, gigantic mess written by a bunch of bloated guys who're only a few years away from senior citizen status.

From Best to Worst: Kreator (the early years)

Terrible Certainty (1987) 

For me, this is the "pinnacle" album by the band. While it retains a large sum of the raw and violent tendencies of the band's earlier output, it is obvious that Mille & Co. were improving as musicians and were keen to flex their newfound abilities. Thankfully, they opted not to go overboard and the end result is the perfect combination of precision and aggression. TC reminds me a mash-up of Immolation's 'Dawn of Possession', Pestilences 'Malleus Maleficarum' and Sepultura's 'Beneath the Remains'.

While Destruction may have alienated some listeners with their prowess and rather bizarre eccentricities and Sodom always sort of chose to stand on the primitive side of the fence, Kreator were always able to juggle both ends of the spectrum with ease and TC, in my opinion, is their ultimate statement.



Flag of Hate (1986)

This 'ep' serves as the bridge between the band's ultra-primitive (yet no less violent) debut and the more, (ahem) "kreative" riffing that would become more pronounced with each release.

Though merely an 'ep', FOH boasts a few of my all-time favorite Kreator tracks including the epic and volcanic blast, 'Awakening of the Gods' and the Terrible Certanity-esque 'Take their Lives'.






Pleasure to Kill (1986) 

Not only did Kreator manage to up the ante in terms of progression and technicality, they also ramped up the violence and brutality that made their debut an instant classic. No small feat there!

There will always be a special place in my black heart for this album as it was the first Kreator album I bought and listened to, not to mention it's just so fucking good!







Endless Pain (1985) 

As far as this list is concerned, Endless Pain is the last of the truly essential Kreator albums (Terrible Certainty if you were to go chronologically).

I have many, many fond memories of blasting this album at high volume and thrashing out during my youth and despite its violent tendencies, there is a great deal of "classic rock" sounding riffs scattered throughout (riffs that were obviously taken to their extreme and warped almost beyond recognition). I can only assume that the reason being is that thrash was still very much in its infancy during this time with rock and roll not so far behind in the evolutionary chain of extreme music.

EP also features Mille at his most absolutely venomous!



Coma of Souls (1990) 

This is probably the album that should have come out after Terrible Certainty as, for me, Extreme Aggression just really didn't cut it.

Without a doubt, COS is Kreator's most mature offering to date. Everything is pristine, from the production to the selection and placement of the riffs, lyrical topics and arrangements, so on.

The bands knack for writing aggressive material is still there, but now it seems to have a purpose. Everything has been tempered and honed and I have to admit, it's a slight bummer to see the band so calculative in their attack rather than caught up amidst the slaughter, throwing caution to the wind, which seemed to be the approach on their earlier records.

Make no mistake about it, though... COS is a standout album and in many ways is as far as the band could have gone in terms of seeking out perfection. Sure, it may not be as gritty and grimy as Pleasure to Kill or Terrible Certainty, but they proved beyond the shadow of a doubt that they could write and record an album on the same level as any one of their more "well-known" peers.



Extreme Aggression (1989) 

Technically, this may be the most advanced of the band's initial run, however, there is something oddly yet undeniably anemic about it. The venom in Mille's voice has been trampled over by a more comic sounding version of his former self. Some of the lyrics are just downright fucking goofy, not to mention the fact that they're rendered cringe-worthy by the sheer awfulness of his vocal performance this time around. Though I've never been the biggest fan of Ventor's work behind "da mic", he really would've been a welcome diversion to Mille's mysterious bout with retardation on this album.

The other gripe I have with EA is the horrendously stripped down and neutered sound of the guitars. There is absolutely NO power to be found here. Sure, there is a certain "razor-ishness" to some of the more technical riffage to be found yet I can't shake the notion that the soul had been thoroughly sucked from out of the whole thing before being palmed off to the public at large.



Out of the Dark... into the Light (1988) 

The songs found on this -ep- (sans the live tracks, of course) somehow manage to sound 100 times inferior to even the worst that Extreme Aggression had to offer, and that's REALLY saying something!

It's rather perplexing that this awful piece of shit was conceived shortly after the release of the mighty Terrible. I am forced to assume that the creative process for that album must have seriously put the proverbial hurt on their asses thus rendering them crippled, creatively, until they re-entered the think-tank that led to the creation of Coma of Souls.

Cool cover, and that it!

Metallica - ...And Justice For All (1988)

Apparently I stepped through a warp zone into an alternate dimension where this album has become one of those "misunderstood" lost classics. I noticed that a lot of people who make these sort of comments weren't even born when the album came out, so how the fuck would they know what kind of impact it had upon its arrival way back in 1988? The other kind of retarded douche that likes to act as if this album is merely passable are the 40-something and beyond aging metalhead wannabe OG's. The ones that have to pretend not to like this album because it managed to squeeze out a (GASP)... video (One, for those of you from another dimension). A staggeringly popular and tirelessly overplayed video, I might add. Did I mention "overplayed"? Oh yeah, I did! So I guess that crushes the notion that this was some sort of "lost" and mysterious record that sort of slipped through the cracks.

Back to the dorks who have to pretend not to like anything given a fair amount of radioplay lest it tarnish their precious "underground" facade... it's funny to me that now all of a sudden these rejects make it seem as if this is some sort of pussy Metallica record that they "guess" they can a throw a bone to in regards to it being the last "ok" Metallica album before the great tidal wave of gay came out from the depths to drown everything in its wake. Yes, the Black album. No, this is not a weak Metallica album by any fucking stretch of your transparent imagination. This actually may be Metallica's most furious album to date. It is certainly their darkest... for a variety of reasons.

Album opener 'Blackened' sees the band going in a slightly more technical direction before the bottom comes out, unleashing the most agonizing and punishing doom sequence the band has yet to render. James' "-tion" rap serves only to heighten the experience. I dare you not to sing along (whether or not you get every "shun" word correct) and headbang simultaneously whilst this riff is drilling a hole into your head. The next two tracks are nice, labyrinthine crushers that pave the way for 'One', '...And Justice for All's 'Fade to Black'. It's funny how many "old school" metal-head douche-balls cry foul when discussing this track for being some sort of attempt at selling out yet are all about 'Fade to Black' and 'Welcome Home (Sanitarium)'. I'm not going to delve into the similarities of these three songs but please allow the concept to resonate.

Side two (yes, the track-list will always be in cassette form in my mind) is even more ferocious and anfractuous than the first, ranging from militant mud-stompers (Shortest Straw, The Frayed Ends of Sanity) to doom and gloom (Harvester of Sorrow, To Live is to Die) to this album's "straight for the jugular" closer and answer to Puppet's 'Damage Inc.', 'Dyer's Eve'. Trust me. Their is nothing even remotely limp-wristed about this album. If there is one complaint to be made it would be that I wouldn't have minded a couple of minutes shaved off of 'To Live is to Die'. The endless chugging can, admittedly, become a bit grating.Other than that, I have to say that Justice is by far my favorite McTallica album. 'Puppets' and 'Lightning' are equally as good but there is something about this album that has stayed with me throughout the years and will be there until the day I die. Sure, I understand that everyone has their own favorite album by the band and you're all entitled to your opinion, but I have to say that everytime some self-important dumb-fuck speaks of this album as being weak in any way, I just want to drop-kick the fuck into a trash compactor and watch his eyes bulge.

Triptykon - Melana Chasmata (2014)

Not bad. Not great. Totally diet. Medium. OK. Bland. Boom. There ya go. This is basically Celtic Frost's 'Monotonous' pt. III. I'm sure everyone'll eat this up.

New Slayer Song 'Implode' (2014)

Ok, so here is the moment that all you haters have been waiting for! Personally, not a big fan of this. These are the same waters they've been drowning in since 'GHUA', but since I seem to be in the minority of people who are not so into the last three Slayer albums, this should go over quite well with most (although, considering Hanneman and Lombardo's absence, everyone will predictably hate this by default).

Sodom - Persecution Mania (1987)

Yeah, yeah, I'm sure a bunch of faggy thrash "enthusiasts" will find their hineys in an uproar after I proclaim this album to be mediocre at best. Fuck 'em. The fact of the matter is that listening to this after the insanely vicious 'Expurse of Sodomy' -ep- was like having some kid come up to you and tag you with a squirt gun right after you just had your head blown off by a bazooka. I mean, talk about anti-fucking-climactic.

Don't get me wrong, this aint a "bad" album, it's just fucking weak, not to mention predictable. If there's one thing that annoys the fucking shit out of me it's a predictable thrash album loaded with riff sequences that seem as if they will not end. Obituary's real fucking good for that one. Don't believe me? Try 'The End Complete'. If you disagree than you are a bonafide fucking moron.

Personally, I think the boys should've held out a little longer until the release of 'Agent Orange', then again, maybe making this stupid fucking album is what was needed in order for things to come full circle.

Persecution Mania is also where Sodom started throwing in annoying punk songs sung in German. The only real winner hear is the guy with the gas-mask on the cover as he so obviously came prepared for this stinker of an album.

Sodom - Expurse of Sodomy [ep] (1987)

Perhaps the anomaly among Sodom's releases as the band were beginning to hone their skills as musicians yet still managing to retain that evil vibe of their earlier works. Hell, I'd even go so far as to deem this their most evil sounding release to date. I'll never forget hearing the beginning riff of 'Sodomy & Lust' and then hearing for the first time Tom Angelripper's evil witch cackle chime in (yes, this was my first excursion into Sodom). I was fucking mesmerized and blown away at the same time. Prior to this 'Reign in Blood' was pretty much the "be all end all" of metal to me, so to hear the stakes raised like this was a bit shocking to me. I had pretty much assumed, hell, I'd have even guaranteed that NO ONE would have been able to surpass the aural bestiality committed on Slayer's crowning achievement until my soul was ripped out from within me, raped and spat upon by this hostile little 'ep'.

Admittedly I was a wee bit bummed when 'Persecution Mania' came out. I was expecting the same ripping savagery of 'Expurse...' yet I did, and still do find 'Agent Orange' to be a masterpiece and perhaps the band's pinnacle moment, but for the experience of sheer violence, nothing quite does it for me like 'Expurse of Sodomy'!

Testament - The Gathering (1999)

At the time I remember being vaguely bummed about this album as I felt it fell a bit short of the mark considering the extraordinary line-up. fast forward fifteen or so years and I am glad that I decided to revisit this album as now more than ever I am appreciative of good ol' fashioned songwriting. Plain and simple. Nothing too fancy or overly complicated, and that's pretty much what 'The Gathering' is about.

I think at the time everyone expected this mind-blowing technical escapade and felt a pang of disappointment when that ended up not being the case. I can say with confidence that I was not ready for this album at the time of its release. I don't think I would've liked it even with the perception I have now. It's just something whose time has finally come to pass and I can say now that this is among my favorites of the band's releases next to 'Low' and 'The Legacy'. 'The Gathering' is also a tremendous improvement over the band's previous album 'Demonic', not to mention the fact that with 'The Gathering' Testament managed to step back on track as 'Demonic' is an anomaly to the band's catalog.

This is one of those albums that I rediscovered after having written it off so long ago and it only gets better with each listen.

Testament - Low (1994)

By the time this came rollin' 'round the bend I was pretty much a snot-nosed and militant death metal head. Sure, I grew up loving Testament's early albums and all that but by '94 I grew weary of thrash and found it to be vastly inferior to the crushing and abysmal sounds of death metal. Also of note, I was extremely bummed when I had learned that James Murphy disbanded the godly Disincarnate to join this at times cornball bay-area thrash outfit. I mean seriously, as good as some of Testament's album are, none of them can contentd with 'Dreams of the Carrion Kind'.

I remember the hype surrounding this album due to Chuck Billy's increasing use of death metal vocals, and I admit that when they're on, they're on. Unfortunately, 'Low' also showcases some of Billy's most horrendously faglicious vocal lines as well ("Confirm who I am, contort all I can..."). I remember cringing and wanting to hide in the shadows when I first heard that ultra-homo verse. What's worse is that for the most part the vocal work on the remainder of that song ('Dog Faced Gods', by the way) is actually pretty fucking good, only to be marred by that faggoty chorus.

Musically, Low may just be Testament's heaviest moment to date (yeah, forget all of the melodic black metal homosexuality of their last album). Not sure how much of this had to do with Eric Peterson wanting to show off to James Murphy that he too can pen a death metal lick (not quite) or what, but it is what it is. I've read in some places this album described as Pantera-esque "groove metal" (seriously, whoever thinks it's cute to coin these terms needs a cattle prod jammed up their ass). I can thankfully and confidently say that this is not the case. Sure, there's moments where your cabeza may begin rocking back and fourth but I assure you it's not as a result of some wigger-fied Pantera riff or any such thing. Honestly, aside from Chuck's lapse into homosexuality, this album is quite the scorcher and stands alongside 'The Legacy' in greatness. All the musicians are on fire here and the songs are all great and most importantly, stand out from one another.

In a time when most thrash bands were either "wigging" out Pantera style or jumping out of the closet (i.e. Metallica, Megadeth, etc...) Testament was one of the very few who not only stood their ground but took the extremity that much further.

Testament - Practice What You Preach (1989)

In my opinion Testament never truly lived up to the promise of their debut and yet, aside from their horrendous flirtation with "groovy" death metal (Demonic) they've never released an outright stinker, either.

While 'The New Order' toyed around with "happier", "bouncier" riffs, 'Practice What You Preach' wholeheartedly delves into the concept. It was one of those albums that I could tell right off the bat something was amiss and yet it wasn't as obvious as say 'Cold Lake'. I mean, sure, this was still an outright, bonafide thrash record with all of the I's dotted and T's crossed but it felt too "safe". Someone had knocked the teeth out of this band's skull. The fact that I picked this up at the record store along with Sepultura's 'Beneath the Remains' probably didn't help much, either.

Yeah, there's just something that's not terribly engaging about this album. Oddly enough, I do enjoy the band's "pussy magnet" track, 'The Ballad'. Being that even amidst the war on posers, thrash bands were not immune to tacking on an acoustic track for good measure, it never really bothered me at the time nor after (though the irony was never lost on me).

The rest of the album really just feels like a dump-truck load of filler. It's the weirdest thing. Nothing outright sucks but nothing on here is that great either. Nothing stands out, except for Chuck Billy's death metal growl at the beginning of 'Envy Life', which is pretty fucking brutal and I believe, the his first attempt at singing that way.

Overall, I feel as though 'PWYP' is a waste of a great album cover. It looks so much better on the outside. But that visual promise soon gives way to the empty feeling of unfulfillment. This would also be the case with the band's next album, 'Souls of Black'. Another sub-par effort boasting an incredible cover. I can only conclude that Testament is one of those bands who does better when they're not pumping out product in a prolific manner.

Sepultura - The Mediator Between Head and Hands Must be the Heart (2013)

Yeah, yeah, yeah... ok, so the album's title is supposed to be a clever reference to Fritz Lang's 1927 masterpiece 'Metropolis', but sorry, the shit just sounds plain lame to me.

Now, before you go thinkin' that I'm one of these "underground" homos who hates everything Sepultura has released post-stinky boy Max Cavalera (or for those truly underground cock-smokers who mock what the band has does since the release of 'Arise' way back in 1991) let me clarify that I've actually quite enjoyed the bulk of the material with Derek Green behind the mic. Despite the goofy homosexuality of certain bands (Limp Bizkit, Papa Roach, P.O.D.) I actually didn't mind the Ross Robinson obsessed sounds of a small number of "nu" metal bands out there (and trust me... I really don't give a fuck what the Autopsy/Incantation wannabes think of that either). In fact, at the time I thought that some of the bands in that scene sounded rather refreshing and certainly brought something new to the table, so I really didn't mind the direction Sepultura headed in starting with 'Roots' (though one could rightly surmise that the first step taken in this direction actually began with 'Chaos A.D.'). For one, I've always preferred slower and lower tuned riff sequences as opposed to the more high pitched and tinny sounds of many a thrash band throughout the 80's. I also felt that the inclusion of Brazilian tribal drumming into the equation was awesome, especially when accompanied by a nice fat bowl (or joint or whatever the fuck your preference is). Sure, I was worried about Max leaving the band but after hearing 'Against' I was convinced that all would be well. Sure, that album wasn't exactly a flawless victory but the good outnumbered the suck and since that time Sepultura has released more hits than misses. Trust me.

'The Mediator Between Head and Hands Must be the Heart' continues the band's tradition of releasing quality yet misunderstood albums throughout the last decade and a 1/2. If there's one gripe I have with this album it's the production. Ross Robinson and Sepultura made a great team back in 1996 as I've always dug the earthiness of that album. This time around it sounds as if Ross showed up to the proceedings drunk on cooking sherry. There is such a sloppy and disheveled sound this time around that it really makes things feel rather tragic as a majority of the riffs and fluctuations are lost within the mix. One of the things that I've loved about the many post-Max Sep releases was the thick and flawless sound that they've harnessed. This time everything gives way to a rather unfortunate breakdown of their once winning formula. I'm sure that all parties involved were once again going for that earthy, "rustic" sound of old but something got fucked up in the process.

Riff-wise there are some winning moments throughout and the band's new drummer is a worthy successor to Igor Cavalera. I, unlike many, have never found fault with the vocals of Derek Green. I always felt that his performances were solid and came with the right amount of energy and projection as needed for the sort of music a band like Sepultura creates. besides, let's be totally fucking realistic here... Max Cavalera was NEVER a giant when it came to vocal precision and dominance.

With all that said, 'The Mediator Between Head and Hands Must be the Heart' is a good album slightly marred by a half-assed production. Great album cover, by the way!

Pantera - The Great Southern Trendkill (1996)

Ok, here we go. First off... let it be known that during the veritable fucking craze that was the era of 'Vulgar Display of Power', I pretty much hated this band. Surprisingly, I actually didn't mind the "chuggier", slower moments generously scattered throughout that album, such as those found on 'A New Level', 'By Demons Driven' (though, the more rocked out main section pretty much embodies everything I hate about this band) and 'This Love'. It was the band's awkward and rather lame take on thrash by infusing Southern fried tendencies into the proceedings that prevented me from embracing them. Odd, as I actually like a good deal of Southern rock as well as the fact that I grew up during and was weened on thrash within its formative years, but something here just didn't gel with me. The band's next album and supposedly more "extreme" 'Far Beyond Driven' only proved to further alienate me from the band and their fanbase especially. Being deeply entrenched within the 'death metal/grindcore' scene during that time, I hardly found Pantera's follow-up to 'Vulgar...' to be offensive by any stretch.

Fast forward a few years and we find the death metal scene, hell, the metal scene in general to be in severely fucking dire straits. Sure, there are still some great things going on in the underground, but as far as the mainstream's all encompassing eye was concerned, metal in general was dying a slow and bloodless death.

I remember during that time thinking that the world could use another Metallica album. Sure, I was hardly a fan of their self titled release, but on the other hand, I felt that a new Metallica album would have the strength to readjust everyone's attention back to what was going on in the metal scene. Unfortunately we did get another Metallica album', and to keep this short and sweet, let's just say that the band unwittingly (or perhaps prophetically) chose 'Load' for the title of their latest sonic outing, as a load of shit is exactly what it was.

A month or so later, Pantera's latest would also be unleashed upon the masses. Of course I was hardly interested in this endeavor, but then a funny thing happened. After merely a minute or so of listening to the first track, I found myself slightly blown away. Elated, even. This was the sort of hatred and aggression that, for some reason or another, Metallica chose to abandon. Another thing that I found to be pleasantly curious was that the Southern rock angle that I always felt to be an awkward element in Pantera's sound, actually fucking worked this time around! Sure, it was groovy as all hell at times, but I never minded a a little "stomp & stalk" in my music from time to time. Sue me.

Despite the fact that 'The Great Southern Trendkill' falls in perfect alignment with the band's insistence on adorning their albums with the worst album covers imaginable, this was Pantera's crowning achievement. This was the band's pinnacle moment. This was their 'Peace Sells...', their 'Led Zeppelin IV'. Everything seemed to align perfectly on this album. The anger and intensity found on their previous albums was here in spades, but their was a considerable jump forward in terms of emotive craftsmanship. I actually found myself fairly compelled by Anselmo's "junkie poetry" and lyricism. Up until this point I hadn't put much stock into his bald headed, tough guy antics and posturing, but this time I felt myself coming around.

Unsurprisingly, this is perhaps Pantera's most misunderstood album. Many folks who were hoping for a retread of 'Walk' or 'I'm Broken' were undoubtedly let down upon hearing the first maniacal outburst of the album opener and title track. Of course not everything is hell and a hail of bullets. There are all types and manners of tempo changes and emotional highs and lows. I still do not consider myself much of a fan of Pantera, but I can say, without a doubt in my mind, this is one of the best albums ever recorded, and fro the record... yes, Pantera is, without a semblance of a doubt, a bonafide thrash metal band.

Hatriot - Heroes of Origin (2013)

Holy open lesions, Buttman! Now this is how you write a fucking thrash metal album, by George! In fact, Hatriot sounds better at sounding like Exodus than Exodus has in a very, very long time. Ol' Zet must've really drilled the "classics" into his kid's skulls, because I swear, if I hadn't known any better I would've have thought these songs to have been written by Gary Holt himself. Not only is the guitar style here more than similar to Mr. Holt's, but the riffs tend to lean towards the more "notier" compositions such as those found on 'Pleasures of the Flesh' and 'Fabulous Disaster', which, for me is a recipe for complete and total domi-fucking-nation!

Vocally, Ol' Zet sounds more venomous and vehement than he has in well over 20 years, and thankfully the chuckles were left at the door. I'm surprised that at 49 this guy sounds better than he did during Exodus' heyday. Hat's off.

If there's anything to gripe about (aside from the lame cover art, which really, with music this fucking good, who gives a shit, eh?) it's that the pace of the album is so fucking unrelenting that a few of the songs tend to get lost in the shuffle and things start to sort of jumble together. But believe me, that is only because this is such a vicious fucking attack on the senses that you tend to become overwhelmed by it all.

I am honestly beyond impressed with this! You can forget about hearing a bunch of homo-melodic bullshit (such as that found on the last few Exodus albums). No tough-guy breakdowns. No attempts at "fitting in" with current trends. None of that stupid shit. This is 100% grade-A Bay Area thrash methodically designed to kick your fucking ass!

Watchtower - Control and Resistance (1989)

This is the kind of pretentious faggot bullshit that people who think they can "play" their instruments listen to. Being that these mindless Ken dolls have no dicks to begin with, they have to "play" with their guitars instead. Fuck that shit. This shit sucks. Beyond the fact that it's obvious that these nerds think that they're "doing something", there is really not a whole lot of sense to be made here. Just some dickless nerd trying to trying to hump your leg with his guitar, meanwhile, because the songs make no sense, the vocalist has decided to sing wherever the fuck he damn well pleases, which makes the "songs" that much more awkward and retarded. Speaking of vocals, this is one of those guys who channels his 'inner rape victim' in order to come across as if he can actually sing. People who listen to this sort of shit should have their guitars snatched from their hands (or in all likelihood, from out of their buttholes) and in turn beaten with them until they lie twitching in a massive pile of bloody sludge and fleshly pulp.

Classic Covers: Slayer - South of Heaven (1988)

The Way's List of Best to Worst Slayer Albums

South of Heaven (1988)

You know, picking between this and Reign in Blood was damn near impossible. For many years Reign... was, without a doubt my favorite Slayer album, and in many ways still is, but I've come to fully comprehend the "evil" of South of Heaven. It's not as abrupt and direct as Reign in Blood, but rather subtle and serpentine (although, of course, there's nothing subtle about lyrics such as "Silent scream, bury the unwanted child, beaten and torn, sacrifice the unborn"!), slowly weaving its spell on you in an almost erotic sort of way.

Reign in Blood (1986)

I remember walking down the hallway in between classes back in middle school, and seeing a cassette without it's cover, lying there in the middle of the hallway. I didn't know who it belonged to and so picked it up and lo and behold, there it was, the big D and J Def Jam logo! Yes indeed, I had just groundscored Reign in Blood! If memory serves me right, I actually skipped the rest of the day so I could go home and dive into the confines of this album!

To me, this shit was practically death metal. To this date there hasn't really been anything out there that could top this album in terms of raw aggression. Tom Araya's vocals are purely venomous and not only did Dave Lombardo pretty much kickstart everybody's obsession with double bass on 'Angel of Death', but his fills are fucking unbelievable! Then there are the riffs. Ahh.. the riffs. Again, to this day, there aren't many bands out there who've been able to tap into the evil side of one's brain that allows them to conjure fourth such harrowing riff work. Sure, some bands may have been "technically" more proficient, but did they sound as good as this? FUCK no.

Haunting the Chapel (1984)

This is where the band began to sound truly evil. Show No Mercy showed a glimpse of darker things to come but Haunting the Chapel is where everything went pitch black.

Seasons in the Abyss (1990)

I remember a lot of my "older" friends who grew up on Slayer complained about this album reusing material from 'South of Heaven' and how the band "ran out of ideas", etc... Whether or not that's the case, I for couldn't give a shit less. One thing is certain, 'Reign in Blood' may have defined Slayer but it was 'Seasons...' that propelled them beyond the stratosphere.

In many ways this is the very last "traditional" sounding Slayer album, though it can be argued that that title rightfully belongs to 'Divine Intervention'.

Divine Intervention (1994)

Til' the day I die, I'll never understand the amount of disdain aimed at this album. Believe me, this is a thrash album through and through and in many ways makes up for some of the faults one may have encountered on 'Seasons...'. Of course, that doesn't mean that 'Divine...' is a flawless exercise by any stretch, but at least 85% of this album cooks with the best of them.

Show No Mercy (1983)

With 'Reign in Blood' being my introduction to Slayer, I actually went back shortly after to 'Show no Mercy' and believe it or not was a bit disappointed. I guess I was expecting a similar rampaging onslaught and instead got an album that wears its Iron Maiden and Judas Priest influences on its sleeves. Not at all a bad thing and through the years I've come to really appreciate this album, but for many years 'Show no Mercy' sat on the backburner of my stove.

Hell Awaits (1985)

Aside from having one of the greatest intros of all time (second only to Morbid Angel's 'Abominations of Desolation'), I have to say I've never been the biggest fan of this album. No, I don't think it sucks by any means, but there's just something about it that failed to hit me like the two albums that followed. It's definitely got an evil vibe throughout but maybe it's the too-clean sound of the bass guitar that kind of kept this album from really making an impression on me. I don't know. Still not a bad album by any means and one that grows on me more with each listen.

Diabolus In Musica (1998)

Yes, this is my guilty pleasure Slayer pick. Sure, it's not even in the same universe as everything released before it nor is it, in my opinion, as lackluster as everything released since. It just it what it is, which is Slayer at their most daring as well as most straightforward. I understand the hate, believe me, I do, but I can't help it. There's something peculiar about this record that I like. Blow me.

Christ Illusion (2006)

Let's face it, Lombardo's return wasn't all that it was cracked up to be, not any fault of his, of course, I mean, he was just playing to the material presented before him, which was basically Slayer suffering from Alzheimer's... a band that was trying to relive their glory days while remaining relevant to the fan base they had acquired during their nu-metal love affair ('98-'01). Not the worst thing they've released and it does have its moments, but unfortunately they're far and few between with the end result coming across as mighty awkward.

God Hates Us All (2001)

Despite some of the laughably outrageous stabs at nu-metal on 'Diabolus...', this album I found to be a bit more offensive as it seemed as if Slayer were beginning to finally get back on track but instead, GHUA wound up being a loosely disguised nu-metal album with a few half-hearted attempts at traditional thrash scattered throughout. It appeared as though Slayer would have been much happier going all out nu-metal but decided in the end that it was best not to lest they completely lose their credentials.

World Painted Blood (2009)

Continuing the awkwardness that began on 'God Hates Us All' and on through 'Christ Illusion', 'WPB' is without a doubt the most anemic sounding Slayer album to date. The thing that kills me the most are these desperate Slayer die-hards that claim that this is a "throwback" album. To what era, might I ask, is this a throwback to?? I'm not sure what is sadder to listen to, the weak slower songs or the pathetic, limp-wristed attempts at writing something fast. If this was Slayer "returning to their roots" than perhaps the band truly is dead after all. I mean, at least 'Diabolus...' was an obvious attempt at doing something different, and whether or not they achieved what they set out to do, the underlying vibe was undeniably Slayer's. This, however, just sounds outright geriatric and makes me cringe. I gotta say, this album pretty much nailed the coffin shut, for me. Actually, 'Christ Illusion' did that. 'World Painted Blood' was just a reaffirmation of that fact.

Slayer - Diabolus in Musica (1998)

Without a doubt the most controversial Slayer album. This album was the dividing factor where many fans of the band's classic material chose to jump ship while the band gained a large number of the youthful zombies infatuated with nu-metal at the time.

Surprisingly, Jeff Hanneman was responsible for more than 90% of the songs written for this album. It's hard to comprehend that the same guy who wrote 'Angel of Death' and 'Altar of Sacrifice' wrote 'Stain of Mind' and 'Love to Hate', which are unbelievably shitty and inept, even by nu-metal standards.

Now, despite the fact that you can pretty much leave any notion of the band playing anything even remotely similar to  their first 5 albums at the door, I actually have a rather peculiar fondness for this album. Even though the nu-metal influence is agonizingly apparent throughout, there is still a vibe that is undeniably Slayer's. There are even instances where it seems as if Hanneman is attempting to channel his inner AC-DC with a more simplistic and straightforward approach than usual.

While Diabolus certainly doesn't compare to the band's eariler works, I have to say that I probably prefer it to everything the band has released since. Even though much has been said about their supposed "return to form" on albums such as 'Christ Illusion' and 'World Painted Blood', they sound more as if the band isn't quite sure what to do with itself. As if they've completely forgotten how to write in an '85-'90 state of mind. With Diabolus, though it's certainly a departure from the band's creatively favored stomping grounds, there is still that warm and omnipresent vibe that is undeniably their own.

Voivod - Target Earth (2013)

I hate when reviewers write shit like "nothing revolutionary here", as if they were expecting the CD to come with a fucking spaceship custom built by the band themselves, wrapped in an American flag. I do not, never have and never will give a fuck about a band sounding "revolutionary". You wanna know what sounds revolutionary? 'Yankee Doodle Dandy'... that's what! Revolutionary. Bah.

What Voivod's latest album, 'Target Earth', does sound like is kick fucking ass metal performed as only Voivod can. Personally, I like the entire Voivod catalog, so this album isn't exactly some sort of "return" of the band writing good music, to me, although I suppose it's more than a slight return to the band's more spaced out and aggressive tendencies ala 'Killing Technology' and 'Dimension Hatross'. Guitarist Daniel "Chewy" Mongrain does a stellar job of channeling the essence of Voivod and I guarantee you that all doubts will be laid to rest upon hitting the play button.

As far as all these gay and pretentious hipster journalists go, stick a feather up your ass and call it macaroni next time you want something "revolutionary", you fucking dolts.

Overkill - Horrorscope (1991)

As much as I love The Years of Decay, Horrorscope showed that all hope was not yet lost for Overkill following the departure of Bobby Gustafson.

Guitarists Merrit Gant and Rob Cannavino picked up where the mighty Bobby G. left off and handle their positions quite admirably. A few of the songs on here carry with them a slight "rock & roll" feel but that doesn't bother me in the slightest and it takes nothing away from the metallic bitchslap you will receive upon hitting the play button.

Title track 'Horrorscope' serves as great and sludgy follow-up to 'TYOD's' 'Skullcrusher' with its lurching pace bombastic riffing and 'Nice Day for a Funeral' has a very haunting and "epic" feel that keeps me hitting the repeat button. Once again the production of Terry Date is spot on and brings out the best in each instrument.

Horrorscope is a great album that, while not quite on the same level as 'TYOD' certainly stands on its own two cloven hooves and proved  that there were still great thrash albums being produced at that time despite the overblown mantra that thrash died in 1990.

The Way's Top Ten Greatest Albums of All Time

1) Cathedral - Forest of Equilibrium (1991)

What can I say? This is by far my favorite album of all time. More of a "funeral" doom album than anything and without a doubt the heaviest release by the band, 'Forest of Equilibrium' introduced to me my love of slides and string bends. The music on this album encompasses everything from colossal heaviness to autumnal beauty. I was lucky enough to have purchased this when it was released domestically here in the U.S. over twenty years ago at age 16 and it hasn't lost an ounce of its magic since. Unfortunately I cannot say the same  for the band themselves but nonetheless, 'Forest of Equilibrium' will be the album I take to my grave.

2) Celtic Frost - Morbid Tales/Emperor's Return (1984/85)

Back when I was but a wee lad, way before "doom" became a legitimate genre and way before that genre gave way to a various number of "sub"-genres including "stoner doom" and "funeral doom", this was about as slow and heavy as it got, not to mention that the vocals of Tom Warrior were pretty much the most brutal and barbaric thing I had heard yet. Almost 30 years later and this hasn't gotten old yet. Technically, this isn't an album, but a re-release of the band's first two ep's. Nevertheless, my first copy of this was on cassette with both ep's bearing the cover you see to the right.

3) Pestilence - Consuming Impulse (1989)

Not only does this boast one of the greatest vocal performances by a death metal band, but there's not a blast in sight. For my money, 'Consuming Impulse' has probably the greatest sounding down picking of any metal album, death metal or other, not to mention the absolutely stellar production by Harris Johns. To this day, no one has been able to make good on the promise of this album, not even the band themselves.

4) Bolt Thrower - Realm of Chaos - Slaves to Darkness (1989)

Without a doubt, the absolute HEAVIEST fucking album ever!! Had Basil Poledouris been unavailable to compose the score for the original Conan the Barbarian soundtrack, Bolt Thrower would have been the ideal replacement pick. Ungodly.

5) Immolation - Dawn of Possession (1991)

In all likelihood, this is the most hauntingly evil death metal album ever. Rich with gloomy atmosphere and never boring, 'Dawn of Possession' is a landmark in northeastern U.S. death metal.

6) Incantation - Onward to Golgotha (1992)

Along with 'Dawn of Possession', 'Onward to Golgatha' is a testament to that faction of northeastern U.S. death metal that chose not to inseminate each song with breakdown riffs. This album is about as oppressive as it gets. This is easily the soundtrack to a journey through some infernal Greek underworld complete with colossal doom riffs and cavernous atmospherics, this is about as evil as it gets. Legend.

7)  Sabbat - Dreamweaver: Reflections of our Yesterdays (1989)

Sick vocals, stellar lyrics and concept overall and just plain awesome death/thrash.

8)  Entombed - Left Hand Path (1990)

The album album that opened up the floodgates and ushered fourth the first wave of Swedish death metal. I can honestly say, without a doubt, that not one of them came close to capturing the cavernous brilliance of this album. The band would release one more solid death metal album before abandoning much of the gloomy atmospherics in favor of a more classic rock oriented approach. Fine by me, but 'Left hand Path' remains the one absolutely essential album within their entire catalog.

9) Carcass - Symphonies of Sickness (1989)

Another band that's been to aped to death yet no one has managed to come close to the eerie brilliance of this album. Smoking a joint, opening up the lyric sheet and reading along with each song is sure to blow your mind. While there was indeed a handful of early death and grind bands that were obsessed with gore and horror films, Carcass to it to the extreme by throwing in tons of wordplay and black humor not to mention impossibly technical medical terminology to boot. The pioneering dual vocals of Jeff Walker and Bill Steer are still the best of that style and the Steer's morbid riffing is among the creepiest you'll ever hear in death metal.

10) Therion - Of Darkness (1991)

Despite some of the thrashier sections on this album, 1991's 'Of Darkness' is one of the most "evil" sounding records to crawl fourth from out of the northern wastes of Scandinavia. Cristofer Johnsson's vocals on this record are my absolute favorite by any death metal vocalist before or since and the undeniable Celtic Frost vibe that coats the album is the cherry on top. Therion would release one more album in this vein and then it was all symphony-city from there on out. Not bad in it's own right but my preference lies with the band's older material. Cavernous gloom never sounded so good!



Honorable mentions:

Carnage - Dark Recollections
Accidental Suicide - Deceased
Obituary - Cause of Death
Darkthrone - Soulside Journey