Krisiun - Conquerors of Armageddon (2000)

Absolutely fucking boring shit right here, folks. People rave about "how fast" this band is. Huh??!! Aside from the fact that the drummer can't really do anything beyond "attempt" a blast beat, his shit really isn't even that fast. His approach is the musical equivalent of one of those tiny little piece of shit spic dogs furiously trying to hump the leg of an elephant. The shit just don't work. This guy makes the clown from Cannibal Corpse sound like a fucking maestro.

Then we have the absolutely lame fucking guitar riffs coupled with what some consider to be decent leads. Decent, until you realize that the dude is doing the same shit on every song. Leads, riffs, everything, the same shit. I can't believe these guys have somehow managed to release the same exact album over and over again throughout the years and still remain signed to Century Media. Someone is asleep at the fucking wheel over at the CM camp.

The vocals are "ok", somewhat reminding me of Deicide sans the demonic midget perched on Glen Benton's shoulder, screaming at everyone.

The funniest thing about this album is that it was produced by none other than Erik Rutan, whose own band consistently sounds like shit with each release, whereas the production here is the only redeeming value to be found. I can't say that I understand exactly how the fuck that works out, but whatever. I couldn't give a fuck less about either band.

This band is Lame (notice the capital 'L'). Sure, I've heard worse, but that doesn't mean that these guys are all of a sudden cool as a result.