Saturday, August 4, 2012

Bongzilla - Methods for Attaining Extreme Altitudes

I actually like the music on here, for the most part. There's definitely a 'Sabbath' vibe throughout the procedure, but one of the main things that kills it for me are the whiny, screechy fag vocals that are gratuitously smeared over every nook and cranny to be found. This is why I hate sludge.

The other symptom of the band's collective bout with Down's syndrome is the whole 'weed' thing. As soon as I see pot plants plastered all over a CD I immediately know that the band members are not the brightest lights on Broadway. Believe me, I could give a shit less if you smoke pot or not. Hell, smoke a $20 rock before you record your album for all I care. That might actually be more interesting, but the weed thing smacks of full blown retardation. A bunch of fucking dorks bragging about how much weed they smoke. As a rule, if a band has any reference to weed or bongs or any of that bullshit in their band name, they get flushed down the proverbial toilet with the quick-fast.

The other thing about this band is that they have the whole redneck/wigger thing going on. Talk about an identity crisis. The last thing I want to see is 'good ol' Billy Joe Jim Bob' bustin' a sag and rockin' a tilted Wafflehouse cap. Not a good look Billy Joe Jim Bob. Not a good look at all.

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